Wednesday, June 06, 2007

A Tale of Two Women

Once upon a time, there was a girl, and she had a coworker. She and coworker got along very well, and enjoyed each other's company both at work and on their own personal time. They hung out together, went shopping together, and coworker even stepped in to throw the girl a bridal shower when her own bridesmaids flaked on her. The girl was happy to have finally found a friend.

The coworker wanted to be in a relationship very badly, to the point of joining multiple dating sites online and going on blind dates and setups. The girl watched the coworker embark on several mini-relationships, and offered advice and support when needed. She laughed at her stories and consoled her when things didn't work out like she had planned. She said nothing when new guys were programmed into her cell phone so that Pachelbel's Canon in D (the song she wanted playing when she walked down the aisle) played when they called her.

The coworker started to see the son of one of her father's friends. He was a good ten years older than she was, and having been single well into his thirties with few long term relationships, he was very set in his ways. He was rude and kind of bossy to the coworker, but she liked him, so she ignored his flaws as girls have a tendency to do at the beginning of relationships.

They had been dating for less than two months when the coworker became pregnant.

He was a decent man, and probably frightened of her father, since he was a powerful man and also his boss, so he did the right thing and proposed to her with a $10,000 platinum and diamond ring that he had to take out a loan for. This is when things started to go wrong.

He continued being mean to her. He was bossy, and she wasn't allowed to do anything, go anywhere, or buy anything without getting grudging approval from him. When she moved in with him, it was made very clear that she was moving into HIS house, and things would stay exactly where they were. She was allotted one closet in the spare bedroom in which to store her belongings. They went to register for their wedding gifts, and a large argument ensued due to the fact that she really wanted a breadbox and he didn't want one on HIS counters or even in HIS cupboards, where it wouldn't even be seen! Needless to say, they didn't get the breadbox.

Naturally, the girl was concerned for her friend. She was happy that her friend was getting married, and having a baby, but worried about how the man was behaving towards her so early in the relationship. She told the coworker to stand up for herself, and told her that marriage meant that they were supposed to be equals, not that he was doing a favor to her by marrying her.

The coworker's three best friends all lived in another state, and therefore were unable to help with the planning of her wedding, so the girl stepped up to the plate for her friend. She did all the stuff bridesmaids usually do, like make invitations, shop for decorations, create centerpieces, go dress shopping, go to tastings, etc. with the coworker. The best friends, who were all bridesmaids, had to do nothing but show up.

What was the thanks the girl got for all of her hard work? She got to attend the wedding, and after that night, never see or hear from the coworker again. Phone calls were not returned, emails went unanswered. The girl wondered what she did that would have made someone treat her in such a shabby fashion, when she came to the conclusion that the coworker, with her wishy washy constitution and inability to stand up for herself, had decided to cut the girl out of her life because of the man.

The man had made it no secret that he didnt' care for the girl, because the girl would defend her friend to his face when he spoke down to her. He argued with the girl incessantly, just for the sake of arguing, refused to see viewpoints other than his own, and would be angry when the girl would not bow to his will. In the girl's eyes, he was a sad loser, working for his FIL, divorced after a VERY short marriage already, living in his sister's house, unable to drive due to DUI convictions, and just plain mean to the woman he was about to pledge to honor and cherish for the rest of his life. His only saving grace, in her eyes, was that the coworker loved him.

The girl was sad, because someone she had thought could really be a good friend turned out to just be someone who used her and then cast her aside when she was no longer needed. The girl had really cared about the coworker, but she knew there was no use pursuing someone's friendship who didn't want to give it, and so she moved on with her life.

Fast forward to yesterday. The girl decides that Jamba Juice is just what she needed for breakfast, when who should she see coming out the door but the coworker! It became very obvious that the coworker saw the girl too, because they made eye contact for a split second before the coworker did something very stupid, something that made the girl very happy inside.

There is this thing, that little kids and cartoon characters do then they are showing displeasure with another person and that they don't want to talk to them. They look purposefully away, stick their noses in the air, and kind of stalk off with quick, deliberate steps. Effective in a child's mind, and in a cartoon, but in real life, with adults?

Absolutely ridiculous!

Yet, that's EXACTLY what the coworker did! The girl laughed to herself. What did the coworker have to be pissy at her about? Was it the girl's fault that the coworker's marriage had lasted less than two years? Was it the girl's fault that the coworker had behaved so poorly to a supposed friend in the past? Was it the girl's fault that the coworker looked like SHIT (hee hee!) in a gigantic gray jersey skirt, a man's oversized white tank top, no makeup, grubby flip flops, bushy, apelike overgrown eyebrows, and horridly nasty hair scraped back into a ponytail? Why no, it wasn't the girl's fault at all!

And so the girl was happy, in that petty little way that women are able to be happy when someone they dislike looks like crap and they look good, and she was able to finally let go.


Blogger em said...

Wow, what at tough situation. Now I can't be totally sure you are talking about yourself here...but if you are...I totally understand the happiness at crappy looking people!! ;)

3:49 PM  
Blogger Judy said...

KARMA, Baby!!!!!!!!

7:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You have mail!

4:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sounds like said girl needs to get a life. Why are you wasting time so many years later. Really...who's the pathetic one.

2:36 PM  

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